Manspreading On A Plane

Get ready to be BOTHERED by the story of a woman who sat on a plane beside a tall man who fully encroached on her leg space. She responded: a leg for a leg. She shared the story online and was very surprised and disappointed to find that many males were defending the man's right to comfort and pointing out that he had testicles and a penis.

Join comedian Julie Kim as she reflects on the situation and comments, and provides commentary.

🎧 Listen to the short audio version.

Preboarding

As a stand-up comedian, I travel a lot. A lot of the time, it’s in the sky. And when it’s in the sky, it’s always via plane. Most times, it’s uneventful. Maybe seven out of 10 times. Ok, let’s say six and a half out of 10 times. Maybe that’s high.

I know how to fly. I have status with my preferred airline that gives me priority boarding, preferred seat selection, extra baggage allowance without extra fees, dignified treatment, all of it.

Manspreading on a Plane

It was June 24, 2024.

My seatmate (a temporary relational label we give someone seated next to us) was a man – a tall man. We did not speak or acknowledge each other. And I loved that. Sometimes, people try too hard to make friends, and then we’re in an obligatory conversation. Not me. It’s okay, we both know what this is.

I was settling into the flight. By that, I mean I was getting my laptop out to bang out some emails (sounds dirty, but it really is not) before putting it away. When you’re in business class, flight attendants barely ask you to put your laptop away, and I’ve sometimes been “allowed” to have the laptop out the whole time. The last time I flew economy, the flight attendant on the same airline gave me a scolding look and said, “You’ll put that away now.” 👀

Anyway, I looked down and saw my seatmate put his whole foot completely

in my leg room. His whole size 12 men shoe foot.

Manspreading on a plane, everyone. He was basically reclining outwards.

I'm not talking about a little bit of encroachment. A little bit of encroachment is normal. It happens all the time, and I've allowed it. In fact, I have benefitted temporarily from shifting in my seat, finding something in my bag, or addressing something for my small child. But this time, this tall man was not with encumbrances. Did I just call my child an encumbrance? Not directly. There was no luggage under the seat in front to reduce leg room. We were in the front bulkhead row which is often coveted for the very reason that it has more leg room. Yet there was his larger-than-average foot (just a single foot) right in my legroom area.

Ex-CUSE me, sir!! Is not what I said. 🤣

My response? What did I do? Just to be a little absurd and amuse myself WHILE making a point, I put my leg up and raised it above his leg, across to his side.

What? I had to put my foot somewhere. 👀 I know this makes me petty, but also hilarious.

Notably, I had on baggy cargo pants, a billough-y, silk-y tent like fabric cargo pants. The pants were taking up space.

PSA: Never wear wide leg pants during plane travel. Don’t wear anything that will fall and touch the ground when you are seated on a toilet because people are gross. I’m talking about all of us.

So, my leg was up. And I held it there for a while. A shit-disturbing length of time. 🤣

After a minute or two, he moved his leg back.

Then, I moved mine back.

It was like chess, except nothing like chess.

I did not cause a scene or say anything to him. What I did was not passive aggressive. I believe in matching energy. In this case, I matched space encroaching.

There was never an option to just take it. I don’t think we (women) do that (simply absorbing this kind of behaviour from males) anymore. We push back, make a point, or at least get a podcast episode out of it.

Relevant Facts

Before I’m going to get ahead of the excuses that a lot of people will be programmed to:

It was not a long flight. Portland, OR to Vancouver, BC is a 1 hour and 16 minutes or 76 minutes flight. But if it’s delayed, the pilots make up time and speed run it in 30 minutes.
This was BEFORE take off. We both boarded early. Nobody was there for a long time. We had bulkhead seats. Those are always chosen. He chose that seat.
This was a preferred/plus row – no ordinary row. This was a row with extra room.

Me? Bothered?

Fucking right.

If he was not aware, that is a problem. If he was aware, also a problem.

This sh1t happens all the time – on the bus and subway – let alone on a plane.

He didn’t even ask me! He should have said, “Excuse me, can I put my whole size 12 foot into your space? I’m uncomfortable.”

Then, I’d politely say “What? No.”

Ladies love a tall man except not on a plane. So much so, I seat my husband across the aisle when we fly together.

Implausible Defence of the Manspread

I posted about this, on Instagram and TikTok.

Many women and men were not having it. Most comments exhibited disbelief that someone would so blatantly encroach on another person’s space.

Here are examples of ridiculous comments from people defending this man. They range from asking what he did wrong (as they think he did nothing wrong) to explaining the male anatomy to me. Many people were seriously educating me on how balls and dicks are a thing.

Their points, summarized:

Men have balls. My response: Okay, I have parts, too. I contain my round parts in a bra and don’t spread my arms all over the place.
He has long legs. Where should he put his legs? Some people suggested he book a higher class, like first class so he could be comfortable. I realize that this is not a practical response, but I wouldn’t be surprised if this guy received a few promotions just because of his tall male-ness. It’s real. Also, this man was slouching, making himself require more room for his legs. He created his own problem and made it my problem.
He had no room! He fucking did. He was not crouching, He was slouching. He wanted straight legs, not bendy legs. He was in a preferred row, with a higher priced seat. The main value proposition of that seat is that you have more room. He had more room. He wanted more-er room. He was the problem.
How is he supposed to close his legs? I have seen men with their legs closed. Therefore, I know that it is possible. People say, “Close your legs” to women all the time. Like when they are wearing a skirt or brutally SA’ed without consent. FUCK YOU, everyone.
Can’t he just be comfortable? Not in my space. Who on a plane is comfortable? Except lie-down seats in first class? That sh1t is so comfortable. When I’m in a pod/lie-down seat, I’m disappointed that the plane has landed. You don’t think it’d be more comfortable for me to lie across both our seats? Of course, it would be. Even though this man was an inconsiderate POS in that moment, I would not do that becauseI respected him. Plus, I am not a fan of physical harassment.
You have extra room! Just give him some. What? No. By that logic, I could tell you to lend him your extra bedroom or den if you’re not using it. Got a shed out back? Want a visitor for the 98% of the time you’re not in the shed?
You don’t know what it’s like to have balls. How do you know I don't have balls, and even if I didn't have balls, how do you know I don't have, a large vulva or, if I was hit with a baseball at a Jay's game and it's really swollen. How? How? How? Why would you assume that that is not the case. If I did have balls, would you let me spread out, too? What if I needed to spread out? Would we just entangle our legs? Have two tall men with balls never sat beside each other, so that this was a problem? Or, do men generally respect each other and their spaces? This is a real question.

Balls, Banana, and Plums

Thanks to the man who pointed out that balls don’t just sit on men’s laps. Imagine they just sat on your laps asking for candy, or telling you secrets or their Christmas wishes? Almost cute.

I've seen men fully cross their legs, but the next time I see a man cross his legs, I'm going to assume he has no balls, is castrated, or has really small balls. Is that something that people get made fun of?

I would actually prefer a man with small balls. To sit beside. I wonder if he's automatically more considerate. Anyways, what do you know what I mean? I have to say, between baseball players and men in public, they often adjust things in their pants. If you have the capacity to adjust your dick and balls while televised on national television, can you not do it in your seat when you're preparing to not be inconsiderate and taking up a woman's space? Interesting, interesting.

An online commenter shared, “Try sitting with a banana and two plums.” He spelled plums wrong, too. What the fuck is wrong with people? Try sitting with a banana and two plums between your legs and see if you can touch your knees together comfortably for several hours.

This was a short flight. Also, I will try this. I will put a banana and two plums between my legs, and see if I can touch my knees together.

Secondly, are you saying that your dick and balls would behave like fruit, like a banana and two plums. Are they that delicate, like your ego? If they were squished a little bit, would like stain your fucking pants and explode? Is that a problem? I guarantee your dick and balls would squish and stain your pants the same way a banana and two plums would burst.

Thirdly, the size of plums?! Whose balls are the size of plums? A plum is like this fucking big (see podcast video). That’s a medical condition. Go see a doctor right away.

Parting (your legs) Message

To the man who was manspreading on a plane into my foot rest space on this very short flight from Portland to Vancouver. I liked your shorts. They were really nice. I'd like to get them for my husband. Where'd you get them? If anybody else knows, let me know in the comments.

See below for just a small selection of comments.

Bonus Story - Manspreading and lack of Spacial Awareness

Similarly, when I was at the gym last year, I had the misfortune of being manspreaded on – gym bro style.

I was doing tricep pull downs on a machine with different accessories and a bar attached to it. In addition, this was one of the machines that someone could use the frame to do pull ups and chin ups – not me though.

While I was doing my tricep pulls, a guy came to me and started doing chin ups an inch away from my face. And I remember when this happened.

Me: I said, “Hey!” He didn't hear me because he had loud headphones on.

Me: And I screamed “HEEEYYYYYYY!” This startled him because he was in his own world, with zero spatial awareness, basically tea-bagging me with every dip.

Finally, he gave me a look like I was extremely rude and walked away as if he was the one who was being harassed. FFS!?

Thanks for reading, everyone.

PLEASE like, subscribe, comment, rate below, etc! If you have a story to share that could be related to a future episode or this one, email us at bothered@juliekimcomedy.com.